Family therapist Jennifer Kolari is here to answer your burning questions on a number of issues from getting your baby to sleep, tantrums, relationship, family and marital issues, to potty training – and everything in between!  Each and every Thursday, a new question or issue will be addressed.

Submit your question now! You can do so anonymously by leaving the personal information fields empty. Simply enter your question in the Comments field, click Submit and Jennifer will respond.

Jennifer Kolari, M.S.W., R.S.W.

Jennifer Kolari is a therapist who has been helping children, teens and families get connected for 20 years. Jennifer published her first book in 2009 with Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada. She has appeared in magazines such as Today’s Parent and Canadian Family, and on Canada AM, Breakfast Television, and CBC’s Steven and Chris. Her insightful strategies, shared with warmth and humour make her a highly sought-after speaker with schools, organizations and agencies throughout North America.

Jennifer spent several years counseling children, teens and parents for the Toronto District School Board and serving as a field supervisor for the University of Toronto faculty of Social Work. Before that she was a family therapist at Integra, a children's mental health centre in Toronto. Jennifer lives in Toronto with her husband and their three children.

Connected Parenting Website

I know that you are not a physician, however, we need your help! My boyfriend (father of the baby) and I disagree on whether or not to vaccinate our child. I keep worrying about the potential health risks from the vaccines, links to Autism, I've heard so much! My boyfriend worries about the potential fall out if we don't vaccinate. What are the pros/cons to vaccination and how do we settle this dispute?

This is a tough one because it is such a personal decision, and because I am not a doctor I can’t give out medical advice. What I can tell you is this is an important decision and one of many that you and your boyfriend will be making as parents. How you get through this together can be a template for how you handle tough issues in the future. The best thing to do is discuss your concerns with your child’s doctor and another health care professional like a naturopath. Listen to both sides, then take some time and make your decision. 

Reading up on the pros and cons of vaccination on the internet can be helpful but it can also be confusing and scary. Talk to other parents who have vaccinated their kids and to parents who haven’t. Make sure you are communicating in an open way with your partner and that you listen and respect one another even if you don’t like what you are hearing. The harder you are on each other, the less likely you are to come to any kind of consensus.

You can also consider delaying the vaccination process a for a little while as you make a decision you are both ok with.  What you can already agree upon is that you love your baby are passionate about what’s best for him and are taking his health very seriously, he is one lucky little baby. Sorry I can’t be more help on this one, good luck.